we'll miss her.

my grandma passed away this morning. crystelle. she was a great lady.
when i was in the 10th grade, i started hanging out with the "not so good kids", we'll say and getting into stuff i shouldn't have been. so, on Thanksgiving day, my parents sent me to El Paso (i was living in San Antonio at the time) to live with them. i had no warning, within a couple of hours i packed my clothes and was on an airplane to "the dreaded" El Paso. i didn't want to be there...away from my comfort zone, my friends, my routine and my life. i was so mad at my parents, in my head i wanted to dis-own them (at the time). what was i supposed to do in El Paso, it was practically Mexico...with my grandparents for the next six months of my life? it seemed like an eternity. on my way over there all i could think about was, "i have to find a way to get out of there". anyways, fast forward a few weeks, after i realized that i wasn't gonna try to "escape" (i think i watched too many Lifetime movies :). i started school at a private school there and got into not only a new routine, but a new life getting to know my grandparents in a way i never would have, had i not had the privelege of making those memories with them.
to sum up the last few years... my grandma was diagnosed with Alzheimer's about 5 1/2 years ago, and when we'd go visit her, she had no idea who any of us were the last few years. it made me really sad, because i have so many memories of her. so many things remind me of her and she told so many stories about my dad's childhood and showed me picture albums of my dad & his siblings that i would have never seen had i not spent those few months with them. one story she used to tell me was that when my dad was about 3 years old, they had a Boxer (dog) and when my dad and his brother (my uncle david) would go in the backyard to play, they were told that they weren't supposed to climb the fence. well, this dog knew the rules, so any time they would climb on the fence, their dog would calmly walk over and gently with his mouth, bite the waistline of their pants and carefully pull them off the fence. that dog watched after them.
anyways, some other things that will now and forever remind me of my grandma are eating grapefruit in the morning and the way she made oatmeal. playing yahtzee with her and saying, "yahtzee-tahzee" as she shook the dice. everytime i see a fig tree or eat homemade fig preserves. going on morning walks and smelling the mountain air & the time i threw on my tennis shoes without socks on, to go on a 3 mile hike with her and coming back with the worst blisters on my heels...so bad that i couldn't wear anything but flip flops for weeks (which isn't as common in texas). going with her to play bridge (or, i should say pass out coffee to the ladies as they played). the way she cooked, she was a great cook...i loved how when she made steak, she'd cut little slits it in and stuffed little garlic cloves in it...it just felt so "made with love" and the way that she'd make chocolate chip muffins that we'd eat as rolls with dinner (not dessert). yes, i think i "filled out" a little living with them :). the fact that we'd usually watch Jeopardy together as we ate dinner every night. her turkey and potato soup that she'd make with the leftover turkey from Thanksgiving or Christmas dinner, delicious! her tuna sandwiches. i remember the way she'd move her hands when she talked, especially when she was really getting into what she was saying. her perfume, every time i smell someone wearing "her" perfume, i think of her. shopping at the PX and how shopping for clothes with her was kinda tough because she wanted everything to be practical & the way she called shirts "blouses" and had to know what kind of fabric everything i tried on was made out of (so cute). how, going to luby's cafeteria for dinner on a friday night was such an outing and going to Sam's with them and trying every sample. riding in the car with her as she (or papa) took me to school, it was on the other side of town & how if i looked to the right, we could see Juarez, Mexico (very glamorous). i remember how she and i would go to church together on sunday morning's and how i accepted the Lord at that little "old people" church where i was usually the only kid that showed up for youth group. and i remember how when summer rolled around and it was time to go home, the way i had tears rolling down my face as my plane took off to go back to S.A.
i'd have to say, one of the things i treasure the most is the fact that she taught me how to sew when i was about 9 or 10 years old...every time i get my sewing machine out, i think of her. all the clothes we made together. the kind of wife she was... strong, faithful, loving, caring, always knew what my grandpa needed. and i'll miss her smile.
grandma, we love you & we'll miss you very much.